Posts tagged Habits
Stop Fearing Money and Love Your Way To Abundance
 
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Money Mindset. Everyone’s favorite topic.

Let’s start with a question: how much money are you claiming for this month? Whatever month you’re reading this on, whatever day of the month it is—how much?

Being able to comfortably speak about money is a result of doing money mindset work. A lot of people—perhaps you—struggle to talk about money AT ALL. Something like stating a desire or intention or goal is powerful, but if we’re too afraid of money to even do that… well we’ve got some work to do.

If you immediately feel resistance to this idea, it’s great that you are here. Often I find that people who are unwilling to even state a desire around how much money they want are operating from a fear that it’s impossible and that the money won’t come. Or that you’re not capable or worthy of making or having that much.

Feel familiar?

There is so much fear around money. It gets built up to be this scary, intimidating, and overwhelming thing.

But in truth, money really isn’t anything. It’s something we’ve collectively prescribed a value too, but in and of itself, it’s just a thing. The way your couch or your coffee mug is just a thing.

Technically “more” money being circulated through things like credit cards and savings and debt than is actually physically printed right now. So it’s a thing that doesn’t… really actually ‘exist’ sometimes. What?!

So from that place we can begin to dissociate money and the meaning we give money. Money holds power because you give it power. Now, I’m a very pragmatic and grounded person—obviously we live in a 3D reality, bills exist—but if we can begin to shift our understanding of money, we can create a lot more of it. Something I remind myself of often is that money is literally being printed all the time. There’s always more. There’s more than we keep up with, there’s more than physically exists. There’s more.

My intention in sharing that is that you can begin to release some of the pressure you feel about money. In my history and experience, the times I’ve felt the most stressed and in fear around money were the times I struggled to make ends meet. When I continue to stay neutral, open, and expansive about money, there seems to magically be enough.

So here’s the core message here: FEARING money doesn’t create more money. Your fears and worries are all valid and are trying to protect you, but they aren’t the thing that will literally create more money. You don’t fear your way to $30k months. You don’t fear your way to $500k years.

Can you think of a time in your life that fearing something you wanted more of actually brought it to you? It doesn’t work like that. You don’t fear a loving relationship and create a loving relationship. You don’t fear a healthy body and create a loving body. The frequency of fear is never going to match up with the frequency of what you desire.

So in regards to money: What if you tried to love, respect, honor, cherish, appreciate it instead? What might that lead to?

In my experience, loving Money will bring more of it to you. Respecting Money will bring more of it to you. Caring about your money will bring more of it to you. But fearing it? Hating it? Feeling angry or resentful or sad about it? Not so abundant.

When I started to recognize my stories and feelings around money there were a few major ones that came up for me:

  • I feared making too much money because I feared being responsible for it

  • I feared spending it or investing it because I feared it going away

  • I feared having too much because it would change my relationships with friends and family

Now like I’ve said before, lot of times our stories/beliefs don’t make logical sense. Those fears logically sound silly, right? Your subconscious isn’t working from a logical place. For me, for whatever reasons, it felt like those things were going to happen and a big part of me was scared and didn’t want those things to happen.

I’m sure you can see how operating from those fears wold be incredibly limiting. How I would—at an unconscious level—reject ways to have too much money. If I didn’t have enough to invest, then I never had to watch money go away. If I never had enough there’s no way it could affect my relationships. If I never made too much then I would never have to learn financial responsibility. And so, I unconsciously made sure I never had too much.

To be clear, that doesn’t look like ‘not trying’ or ‘being lazy’ out in the real world. It shows up in tricky and surprising ways:

  • It showed up as underpricing.

  • It showed up as giving away too much for free.

  • It showed up as not enforcing contracts or boundaries.

  • It showed up as bad investments on things I knew I didn’t need.

Not having money coming in easily to your business doesn’t mean you’re not trying. I am sure that you are trying very hard! It means there’s something else in the way. Fear. Fear that is leading you to super subtle and not obvious actions that keeps money away.

The good news in all of this is that we can combat those fears. We can rewrite those stories. We can learn to love money instead of fear it. We can learn to accept money instead of unconsciously rejecting it. That’s work I help a lot of people navigate through and it leads to huge shifts in what you create with your business.

When I think back to some of the best decisions I’ve made in business, they include:

  1. Hiring a bookkeeper and accountant

  2. Deciding to work on my money mindset

  3. Making working on my money mindset a daily practice

Those three moves have been monumental. They’ve made more of an impact than any Instagram strategy or course or blog post. Deciding to let money come into my business easily, making a practice of LOVING money, and hiring experts to help me manage money have been one of the big reasons I’ve made six figures and continue to grow my income. (Inner work and support. The magic formula, y’all!)

Let’s talk action items:

  1. Commit to purposely changing your thoughts and feelings about money. This doesn’t have to be hard or rocket science. When you notice thoughts like ‘I can’t make any money’ or ‘everything is too expensive’ make a decision to change the thought to one that is more positive about money. Decide to think that money comes easily to you. Decide to think that you can have nice things. People get really worked up over changing their mindsets and how hard it is to break these negative loops—it is building a habit, just like anything else. The first time you say ‘money comes easily to me’ you will feel silly. The second time you will feel silly. The third time you will feel silly. The 42nd time you will feel good. The 108th time you will feel amazing and abundant. Just keep going.

  2. Commit to daily work on your money mindset. This can be as simple as bringing an affirmation practice into your morning that says ‘I am abundant’ or ‘it is easy to make money’. Like the previous step, creating these habits will open your eyes to opportunities, will allow you to see instances that may well already be there but that you’re just not yet cashing in on. 

  3. Bring in support/Pay attention to your numbers. Perhaps this looks like an accountant or a bookkeeper or even a coach to help support your money mindset journey (hi, it’s me!). Perhaps this looks like doing the 21-Day Abundance Accelerator. Perhaps this looks like creating money dates and just neutrally looking at your numbers once a week or month. Get support and actually know/neutralize your money.

Are we ready to stop fearing money? Are we ready to love money? Invitation to say it out loud right now. I don’t care how dumb you feel…. Say it with me, “I love money and money loves me”. How do we feel? Are we excited!? Are we abundant?! Yes. We. Are.

 

What did this bring up for you? Send me a DM on Instagram!

 
 
 

 
 
The Formula For Success
 
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You keep looking for a formula for success, but the truth is: There’s not a formula for success. Nobody can sell you a framework for success

Yes, even though so-and-so sells a program that states it’ll guarantee your success… it’s not true. Or possible. Let’s discuss.

First things first: No one can define success for you.

So while there are lots of great leaders and teachers in our industry, the 4 step formulas they are insisting are all you need to be ‘successful’… well…

What does that even mean? All they can really give you is a formula to what they believe or consider success to be. Now maybe y’all overlap in your definitions, but are you considering that in your purchasing decisions?

The idea of selling something that defines success for everyone is a little disheartening to me. What if your idea of success is different? At some subconscious level suddenly you’re hearing that what you want isn’t valid or good enough, when in truth, the mere fact that you desire it inherently makes it good enough.

And then, let’s just say we alllll decide across the whole world that success is making 6-figures…. well, okay—but there are literally hundreds of thousands of ways to make 6 figures. You could sell one hundred thousand things for a penny. Or you could sell 10 things for $10,000 a piece. Or you could sell 50 things for $2,000. So who’s way is the right way?

Spoiler Alert: No Ones!

There are a lot of people who have figured out ways to create their version of success, but there’s no right definition or right path. And getting yourself caught in a pattern of thinking the answers are out there, that someone knows better than you what you want is… a recipe for disaster.

I’m not throwing shade. I don’t think people are lying or manipulating, truly. I think people have reached milestones using various ways—they ALL have the potential to work. But no one person’s technique is superior. No one method is superior. No one definition of success is superior. YOU get to define all fo that for yourself. You MUST define all of that for yourself.

Now, that’s not say don’t invest or don’t learn. But decide what you want, what you need, what success is for you FIRST. If you decide it’s Instagram, and you want to go HARD on it. Cool, then look for support and resources around that. But don’t move forward with ‘I have to use IG because so and so says and it’s the only thing and even though I hate IG, I’m going to force myself to use it.’ That will never work.

When you find the path YOU want to take, totally get support. I’m a big fan of support But also, keep these things in mind:

First, those methods worked for those people because they stuck with it. They didn’t flip flop around. They decided this platform or method or channel was going to work for them and they made it work for them.

Second, they may sell something different than you to different people than you—so while you can certainly learn from them and take their advice—you are going to have to step up as a creative problem solver and adapt things to fit your business.

Which brings me to the main point of everything today: Be a creative problem solver.

Stop looking to everyone else for the answers. You have the answers. You have the formula. You have the steps to take that will work for you. Sure, learn from others, take bits and pieces here and there, and then filter everything through the YOU FILTER and make it work for you.

The reason I share about how I run my business is because I want you to have an opportunity to get some ideas, absorb what you need, leave what you don’t, and make it your own. I don’t need more copies of me. You’re you! And that’s amazing AND needed.

The truth is, even if someone could sell you a perfect 4-step formula and you followed it step by step and you achieved exactly what they said you would… I’m willing to bet something would still be off. You hear stories like this all the time. People hit these epic milestones, have all the money and fame and whatever… and they’re deeply unfulfilled and unsatisfied and burnt out. They worked the plan, but it wasn't THEIR plan. It didn’t fit THEIR needs or desires or versions of success.

What is more important to me, how I think about investing at this point is to invest in myself. To learn more about myself. To learn to trust myself. To learn to be a creative problem solver. I don’t need a single 4-step formula, I’m beyond that—and I bet you are, too. If you’ve bought all the things and something still isn't clicking… here’s my thoughts for you: maybe stop looking for the ‘right’ answer and start doing the deeper inner work to figure out YOUR answer. That’s what having a coach has helped me do. They don’t tell me the ‘right’ answer. They help me find MY answers. That’s the magic.

 

What did this bring up for you? Send me a DM on Instagram!

 
 
 

 
 
Finding your business vision over time
 
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When I was in college I had two main professors in my upper-core classes. One of them was, for lack of a better word, ‘a character’, as I’m sure most art school professors are. He pushed me to think more creatively and step into my own abilities. I remember having a discussion with him where I was expressing a desire to do something, but sharing a fear that I didn’t think I was allowed to do it. In that discussion he taught me a phrase that I, a former good girl, had never heard before.

He said, it’s better to ask forgiveness than to ask permission.

To be honest, I think that might’ve been the most groundbreaking lesson I learned in college. Well, besides the fact that you should never drink wine that only costs you a penny, but I digress.

Anyway, I want you to have that moment, too. It’s time to recognize that you can do things any way you want. The rules that you think exist don’t actually exist—especially when it comes to creating your own online business. 

Let’s apply that idea to today’s topic, your Vision. When I got started with my design business I was like… well shit. I don’t have a HUGE VISION. I don't want to change the world or cure cancer or anything. I just want to get paid to work from home in my pajamas. And I felt BAD because so many people online had these amazing stories of overcoming hardships and struggles and wanting to give back and help their community or the world.

Now of course, no shade to people that have that vision. That’s amazing and incredible and I am so grateful for the positive impact you are making.

But… not all of us have that big picture vision quite yet. Not all of us want to change the world… or at least haven’t realized it yet. Some of us just like sleeping in and not having to commute to work, you know? This post is for those people. The one who feel badly that they don’t have a grand message to impart on the world.

I want to tell you something: It’s okay. It’s totally fine. You are so, so, so fine my friend. Do not let this idea that you have to have some sort of bigger impact purpose hold you back from doing the thing you really need to do: Show up. Start. Create. Be a business owner.

If you’re fretting over not feeling important enough or impactful enough, the problem isn’t your lack of vision. It’s your lack of taking action and starting. The other stuff? The big deal stuff? That’ll sort itself out. But for now: You just gotta get to getting my friend.

Starting and running a business is a huge journey in learning and understanding yourself. It’s a self-development journey. You’ll find your stories and beliefs and ways of existing in the world thrown into pandemonium along the way. And that’s exciting! That sort of personal upleveling will reflect in your business and things will grow and evolve and become better and better too. But none of that can happen if you are fixated on ‘figuring everything out’ before actually starting.

As you go down the path of entrepreneurship and begin to better understand yourself and your beliefs and feelings, it’s inevitable that things will start to shift for you. And I don’t mean that you’ll suddenly care about world issues. What I mean is, you’ll start to see themes and parallels pop up in your life and interests. You’ll dive into new interesting ways of existing and being. And some of these transformative steps may influence where you want your business (or life) to go.

But it would be nearly impossible right now for you to sit down and just figure this shit out without experiencing things. 

Give yourself grace and permission to NOT have it all figured out right now and move forward despite feeling like you’re not ready. Because here’s the big spoiler alert that everyone manages to leave off of their sales pages and Instagram captions…

Nobody has it figured out.

Nobody knows what they are doing either.

They’re figuring it out, just the same as you.

They might be a few steps ahead of you in their journey, but they’re still figuring things out as they go. That is OKAY. That is wonderful. That is fine. It’s more important to learn how to accept where you are and enjoy the journey, than to just find the end point. Oh, and, just to point out: I don’t think there is an endpoint anyway.

I have a memory of learning how to swim—which if you’re from Florida you learn how to swim as, like, an infant. In the memory I’m swimming towards my dad. Every time I get close, he steps back just a bit. I remember being SO frustrated with him, because I knew what he was doing. I just wanted to GET to him.

There’s, like, a huge life lesson in that (that I’m pretty sure my dad didn’t intend, haha). When you get to where you think you are going, I guarantee something else will pop up and you’ll be on the path again. If you want to be an entrepreneur, you are not built for complacency, friend.

In my own experience, it took nearly 3.5 years to find my current vision. Even now, I can accept that it will probably change, grow, and evolve as I continue. I have a much better picture of who I am and who I want to be in this world and the impact and legacy I want to leave now, at 28, then I did at 24.

At the same time I am fully aware that I am ONLY 28. I have so much to learn and so much growing to do still. So, I’m open to what comes—while still being excited about where I am currently going. That’s what I want for you, too. I want you to feel excited about the journey and the path and the growth and know that things can and will change. But if you’re focusing on being the best version of yourself, those changes will always be good ones and for the good of those around you.

So you can stop holding yourself back from action because ”what you want isn’t enough”. You’ve gotten this far for a reason, you have these seeds planted for a reason. I believe that we develop dreams and ideas because we are fully capable of creating them and bringing them to reality—and you have no idea what that journey will look like. You have no idea what you’ll learn or discover about yourself and your impact. So you can go ahead and get started and watch what unfolds.

 

Do you already have a vision for your business? Send me a DM on Instagram!

 
 
 

 
 
Common Beliefs That Are Not Serving You or Your Business
 
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Let’s talk about the most common stories I hear entrepreneurs say in our online space. Are you ready? There’s a chance you hold some of these as FACTS or TRUTHS in your life and honestly you’re about to get called out, my friend. Nicely though! What I want you to do when we discuss them is to either now (or later when you’re in a more open minded headspace) ask yourself, ‘do I believe this to be true?’ about the different stories and see what comes up for you. Because I know you want to rewrite your stories and believe in yourself more, don’t you?

The first one that is running rampant IS: I’m not ______ enough. Commonly: I’m not good enough, I’m not smart enough, I’m not experienced enough, I’m not extroverted enough, and so on.

I am grouping these all together because they are all coming from the same place: A lack of confidence in just how fucking powerful and ENOUGH you are.

Because my friend YOU ARE EVERYTHING ENOUGH. You are enough right now. In this moment. Without any more work, without any more effort, without any more attempts to change. You are enough exactly as you are. You are good enough. You are smart enough. You are experienced enough. You are extroverted enough. You are WORTHY of all the success you desire.

The moment you can step into that identity, the moment you can fully accept and understand and KNOW and I mean REALLY KNOW that to be true… that’s the moment everything will change for you. Living in this state of not-enough-ness will keep you stuck, small, complacent, and overwhelmed by life and definitely by business. 

You affirmation for this, if this is YOU is, I am MORE than enough. I want you to say that to yourself every morning while you are brushing your teeth and staring at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Instead of picking a part your face, or wondering why you have such dark circles under your eyes, or regretting that decision to not wash your hair… look at yourself and remind yourself just how enough you are. Remember a belief is just a thought that you think over and over and over again, so make this a morning ritual until it becomes a BELIEF. You are enough.

Number 2 is: I don’t have anything to say. I hear this come up a lot when it comes to writing blog posts, creating podcast episodes, or even just going on stories on Instagram. And I get it because this is one that I battled with too.

I’m going to paint a picture that maybe a lot of you can relate too: When I got started as a designer I had no desire to change the world or make a big impact. I just wanted to work from home, be able to go out on the boat whenever my bartender-boyfriend asked me too (aka on a Tuesday, randomly), and make enough money to cover my bills and the random Target splurge trip. So when it came to creating content I was like… wtf do I talk about? I don’t know how to run a successful business yet, so how can I talk about that?! I don’t know the best ways to post on social media, so how can I talk about that?!

But here’s what I did know: Graphic design. I knew a lot about design. I knew about how design could impact your business. I knew about the technical needs behind good design. I knew about how a great visual brand could help build loyalty. I knew all of those things and it was basically second nature, so I kind of forgot that… Well not everyone ELSE knew that.

And that’s the content that I should be creating. As things have grown and as I’ve shifted my business and developed bigger passions and purposes, how I create content and what I have to say has developed. But if you feel like right now, where you are at in your business you have no fucking clue what to talk about… Talk about what you know. Talk about what you do. Talk about how it’s important. And talk about the value it can bring to other people.

That’s all. Sure, share some life stuff if you want—but if that’s not your cup of tea then don’t! And release the pressure to have to be THE MOST OPEN, or have THE BEST LIFE CHANGING THINGS to talk about and just talk about what you know and share your unique thoughts or perspectives or thoughts about it.

Your affirmation for this could be: When I share, I help others. And before you hit publish, or record that story, or whatever it is that you are doing… take a few moments and repeat that affirmation to yourself. I do this. Whenever I post to social media I say “with this post I will make a positive impact and reach the people that need to hear this message” to myself. And y’know what? It. Fucking. Works.

The last story I want to talk about today is: No one would buy that from me. Oh friend. With that attitude, you’re absolutely right. Because if that’s how you are approaching sales, I can say with near certainty that you are not: Actually making offers, sharing the value of what you do, or even talking directly to your potential clients.

If you don’t believe in what you offer, nobody else will. Period. It’s like going to a doctor and before surgery they’re like ‘idk I guess this’ll work’—are you gonna get that surgery from them?! HECK NO.  You would be out of that hospital so freaking fast.

You have to believe in yourself and in your offers first. Something interesting I’ve learned about in my hypnotherapist training is just how vital it is for the hypnotherapist to believe that the trance will work. It’s almost MORE important that I as the therapist believe in your ability to go into trance and there are even certain measures taken during the beginning phases of the session to help convince the therapist that it’s working. Isn’t that remarkable? Because if I as the therapist don’t believe in the practice how could I EVER except you as the client to?

So in the same way if you as the business owner dont think your offers or programs or services are worth it, or good, or going to work…. Why would anyone else? 

Your affirmation for this, if you struggle to believe in your offers is this: I Create Amazing Transformations For My Clients or My Clients Get Amazing Results. You may need to tweak that one depending on your offers/services, but you get the idea. And I want you to focus on this affirmation before any type of sales call or pitch, and before you sit down to actually do the work for your clients.

Okay. So those are the top 3 stories that I hear WAY TOO OFTEN and I want you to work on rewriting. Do you have any others that you’ve noticed recently? I’d love to hear!

 

Did any of these resonate with you? Send me a DM on Instagram!